Culture Making

Just finished listening to a talk by Andy Crouch that was assigned to us for the Gotham Fellowship. He discusses culture making, influencing culture, changing it...

And he starts by saying that culture changes when people make more culture.

He admits this is a "painfully obvious" observation. But then Crouch points out that the way Christians have tried to change culture is by:

1) Condemning and/or protesting the culture that already exists

2) Analyzing it and trying to copy and replicate it within their own subculture

3) By consuming it. Crouch says even a motivated group of consumers can't change what is offered for consumption by consuming what they would like to be influential.

Crouch:

"The only way culture changes is when we get involved, get our hands dirty and make some more of it. And our neighbors by the grace of God say, 'That's intriguing. That's good. I'd like to try that. I'd like to spread the word about that.' That's when culture changes.

Which is both exciting and slightly pressurizing because this means that the ball is in our court to change things... right?

P.S. Photo by Leslie Talley.

"For What We are Worshipping, We are Becoming"

“A person will worship something, have no doubt about that. We may think our tribute is paid in secret in the dark recesses of our hearts, but it will out. That which dominates our imaginations and our thoughts will determine our lives, and our character. Therefore, it behooves us to be careful what we worship, for what we are worshipping we are becoming.”
-Ralph Waldo Emerson

Jesus Loves Me, This I Know

When people find out that I am engaged after having dated someone for four months, there is a spectrum of responses that range from “Oh my goodness was it love at first sight?!” to the skeptical raised eyebrow and “Well, are you sure this is the one?” I have yet to figure out how to gracefully respond to either query nor do I really know how to deal with the range of responses in between. 

So I was thankful when I heard this while listening to the Tim Keller marriage series the other day:
“Therefore what the Bible means by love is a commitment. At some point love is a decision to serve somebody and be committed to somebody regardless of your feelings and regardless of how that person acts…. At some point, you make a decision- I am going to love this person. Your feelings will always come and go but the problem is a lot of people don’t get married because they are sure that if this person is ‘the one’ that my feelings will never ebb. If this is ‘the one’ then I’ll just know it’s ‘the one’ because I’ll never have any problem. I will always feel like giving myself to that person. You will wait ‘til hell freezes over if you wait for that. Love is an action first that leads to feelings not a feeling that leads to an action.”

It’s difficult for me to internalize that the love I am given is not conditionally based on my performance as a fiancé/wife (which is good, because my track record stinks). But if it was or if my love for my fiancé was based on their track record then I can see why only being with someone for a few months is not enough time to establish that record. If my feeling of love is conditionally based on how you treat me then of course a few months of you treating me well is not enough time to decide to make a lifetime commitment. So I guess I understand their skepticism. 

But what if marriage is not that? What if marriage means that even when I am being a terrible selfish person (which I will be because I’m human) that you still choose to love and commit to me? And what if marriage means that when you are being a terrible selfish person (which they will because they are human) I will choose to be committed and loving to you?

But what is truly overwhelming is that is what Jesus does every day. And even though I will never perfectly love someone, Jesus perfectly loves me when I am selfish all the time. I am His and He is mine. And every day He holds up His end of the bargain even when I fail again and again. That’s capitalized Love. Every day I choose not to prioritize Him. I choose not to Love Him. I choose not to serve Him. And some days I even curse Him to His face. And yet, there is nothing I can do today to make Him love me any more and nothing I can do today to make Him love me any less. 

I think I am only beginning to experience the tip of the iceberg of what it really means to be unconditionally loved by my Savior.

And it’s kind of overwhelming.
And beautiful.

P.S. Photo by Megyn Barroner

Song of the Day

The House of God Forever by Jon Foreman is my new song obsession:

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=uoXWIK1lfyo

"God is my shepherd.
I won't be wanting.
I won't be wanting .
He makes me rest
In fields of green
With quite streams.
Even though I walk
Through the valley
Of death and dying
I will not fear
'Cause you are with me.
You are with me .
Your shepherd staff
Comforts me .
You are my feast
In the presence of enemy .
Surely goodness
Follow me
Follow me
In the house of God, forever."

Love it.

Internalize That

"We will never have a challenge [Christ] can't empower us to meet. We will never have a need He can't fill. We will never have an earthly desire He can't exceed. When we allow Christ to be all He is to us, we find wholeness. One piece at a time. Every time you discover the reality of Christ fulfilling another realm of your needs and longings, His name is written on a different part of you, and you are that much closer to wholeness."
-Beth Moore

Amen.

Weight vs. Joy

It’s amazing to me that during such an exciting time where you are about to entire a God-glorifying union the ways Satan tries to get you to focus on so many other things to keep the focus off of how grateful and how joyful you should be. And its amazing to me how easily influenced I am that I let him succeed. There are so many circumstances/frustrations/people/thoughts being used to steal joy. And what is most frustrating is that it’s my choice to let those things steal my joy, to encompass me with distress/anxiety/despair. And that I have such an infantile sense of God’s goodness and such a lack of discipline in my prayer life that I let these things steal my joy away. I let them send me into fits of frustration and worry.

So thankful for this reminder from Laura (which she has given me permission to share) which puts me in my place about what a gift God has given me in this man who will be my husband and how truly undeserving I am of anything I receive and how abundantly good God is to me:

“One thing I was thinking: I hate those comments from people (that are inevitable) that I see you've already been getting. The "You deserve it!" comments. The truth is, there is no better time for lies to creep into your heart against your knowledge than during engagements. And that is one of those lies you have to fight your darndest. People mean well, but the truth is, you don't deserve it. It is a gift. God is good. But none of us deserve these beautiful relationships we're in with family, friends, or lovers. It's so apparent, quickly, in marriage how selfish and wretched we are, and how we don't deserve love from one another. So, fight those lies. Oh, they'll come from even your best friends. But, fight them. All of a sudden you'll feel yourself feeling entitled to something and you'll realize that all of those lies society says about brides are working their way into your heart. Your wedding will not be perfect, in the true definition. If your goal is a perfect day, disappointment will follow. You won't be able to keep everyone happy with decisions you make. Your engagement will not be all roses and butterflies. Coming together is messy and don't be afraid to let people see that.”

If my attitude is anything other than a complete and total understanding of the fact that God has gifted me with this person, then of course attitudes of disappointing others, dealing with wedding criticisms, and nitpicky wedding planning nonesense will steal my joy because Satan has gotten me to focus on the minor details and inconveinces of life instead of the major blessings that God has imparted on me.

Again reminded of Beth Moore saying:

"We are wise to force ourselves to keep differentiating between simple inconveniences and authentic tribulations. The more detached and self-aborbed we become, the more we mistake annoyances for agonies."

Is stressing over a wedding color an authentic tribulation?

Hardly.

Is freaking out over not having someone on the guest list an agony?

Not quite.

Is being fearful at the awkwardness of family interaction on my wedding day necessary?

No.

Laura was right to warn me of this trap. Our society has created an atmosphere where brides are encouraged to total self absorption and I'm already being tempted in that vein by evidence of the fact that I am so easily frustrated by the minor details of a day instead of the major detail of the miracle God has worked in my life. The miracle of God bringing two of His sinful children together in a holy union to glorify Himself.

Praise be to God.

P.S. Photo by Leslie Talley.

Engagement

With engagement comes wedding planning.
With wedding planning comes the chaos.

Chaos= IneedtopressinalittlemoredeeplytotheLordtopreservemysanity.

Thankful for these prayers by JD Grear which I am trying to pray every day to keep me focused on what I need to be-not my fiance, not my wedding, not my friends, not my guest list, not my family, not my flowersdresscolorsschemebridesmaidphotography. No, no. But I need to be focused on my Lord.

-"God, your presence and approval is all I need to have joy today." (His Sufficiency)

-"God, because I am in Christ I know there is nothing I can do today that would make you love me any more, and there is nothing I have done that makes you love me any less." (His Unmerited Love and Grace)

-"God, everything the gospel tells me about your intentions for my life is TRUE." (His Goodness.)

You can read the entire article here:
http://theresurgence.com/greear_staying-centered-on-the-gospel

P.S. Photo by Murph Holder.
P.P.S. October 24th is the date. :-)