"Jesus went out to them, walking on the lake. When the disciples saw him walking on the lake, they were terrified. "It's a ghost," they said, and cried out in fear.
But Jesus immediately said to them: "Take courage! It is I Do not be afraid."
"Lord, if it's you," Peter replied, "tell me to come to you on the water."
"Come," he said.
Then Peter got down out of the boat, walked on the water and came toward Jesus. But when he saw the wind, he was afraid and, beginning to sink, cried out,"Lord, save me!"
Immediately Jesus reached out His hand and caught him. "You of little faith," he said, "why did you doubt?"- Matthew 14:25-32
I was confronted this week with the knowledge that I was living as if I believe God does things halfway. Jesus says "Come" out on the water, take a risk, trust me, follow me and believe that I have your best interest in my perfect design. So I take that step. I get out of the boat. And then when I am standing on the water, I start doubting/ freaking out/ thinking that He's brought me out here and he's going to let me drown. (Which if I did, that would be okay, right? Because "If I perish, I perish.")
But He has never let me drown yet. He always reaches out His hand and catches me. Although rarely does being "caught" look like what I thought it would. Maybe I wanted to be caught by a nice embrace and instead He tackles me in a fishing net and throws me over His shoulder. But He doesn't let me drown. And while I'm struggling around in that net on His back, kicking and screaming, I am growing in my trust and my love for Him. I am growing in my belief that God is Sovereign, Consistent and Loving. I am growing in my faith.
I saw a production of "The Winter's Tale" recently and at one point one of characters says "It is required you do awake your faith."
God does not do things halfway. He has not covered my sin halfway. He does not only heal me halfway. He does not keep His promises halfway. If He calls me to do something, He will not expect me to figure out how to get there on my own, He will provide the means.
When I am fearful of drowning, it is required that I do "awake my faith". It is required that I make a decision to be faithful and not to doubt until my story is written... until my story is completed.
(Photo by tanakawho from Flickr.)